Coming Soon: Nude Photos!

I am so offended! I heard her laughing and talking about "the incident" to someone on the phone. So apparently she blames me and is telling even more people. This is horrible!

I think perhaps I'll take Pal's advice on ways to screw with Mommies. A few pictures of her like that on the Internet and I bet she won't talk trash about me again!

I'm trying to figure out a way to prove that the ferrets framed me. It's really quite simple. They snuck into my room, stole a couple of kitty cigars and planted them by me. When the opportunity arose, they got her attention and she yelled. As I jumped down, she spotted the kitty cigars (yes, there were two--the other was several feet away--which should surely prove my innocence, but she is stupid).

My theory is that the ferrets have somehow found a secret entrance to my room and are sneaking into my litterbox for snacks. I bet they are little poop-eaters. That's probably how they got the idea of framing me. It seems only natural that they would eat my remainders in hope of gaining some of my fabulous qualities.

It's really not much different than the hunters that eat the still-pulsing heart of their prey in hopes of acquiring their soul and stealth.
~Mashed Potato~