Mad Mash Beyond the Litterbox

...maiming & mutilating myself in a macabre mustelid madhouse...

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Presents! Presents! Presents!

A lot has been going on here. The slave finally bought me the house that she has been promising me for the past three years. She explained that was why my birthday seemed so lame this year--she had been in the process of getting me this big surprise. The house has levels which took me a while to get used to, but I do like trying to kill her as I slip under her feet when she moves between the levels. With her gone, I could get rid of the weasels...

That's totally groovy, too! The weasels are trapped in one room, the whole rest of the house is mine! She keeps saying that she refuses to let the ferrets destroy her whole house, like they did at the last place. You would think she would wise up and just get rid of them altogether. Stupid, stinky, little slimeballs.

Perhaps worse that the weasels (is that possible???), there are noisy, red rodents with bushy tails that I see out the pretend doors, but can not get to. I hear them racing around in the walls and the slave has told me that if they don't get out of the attic, she's going to throw me up there. I am not sure what exactly they are, but they sound loud and big. The slave is plotting their demise; so hopefully, I won't have to come face-to-face with them.

And perhaps the biggest news... The slave finally got me the kitty I thought that I wanted. She calls it my early Christmas present, but I hate it and I hope she sends it back! It stinks and it leaps at the walls. I hissed at it and swatted at it, but it is still here. It's ugly beyond belief--with a long, pointed face; big ears; and it's all skinny and lanky. Plus, that whole being crazy-insane is unsettling. Maybe she'll put it in the attic instead? Besides, my heart still belongs to Sir Inigo--that will never change.

~Mashed Potato~

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Already Scared

Oh no! Not Halloween again! I hope she doesn't get any ideas. That witch's hat last year was SO not cool--I thought about calling the SPCA myself! And if she does get ideas, I hope she does it to the ferrets and not me...

~Mashed Potato~

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